Lifestyle

It Is Not Love; It Is Exploitation

There are times when we are so head over heels for our partner that we choose to ignore their manipulative and dominating side. It’s after a lot of hardships and trouble in the relationship that we wonder if it is love or mere exploitation. Sometimes, the realisation can come so late that the pain becomes excruciating.

Today I am going to tell you about the signs of an exploiting partner in an abusive relationship. If you find your partner behaving similarly, it is not love, it is exploitation. And it is time to sign out.

1. HE WANTS YOU TO MAKE HIM YOUR ‘PRIORITY’

An exploitative partner wants you to make him your priority but won’t do the same for you. He expects you to rearrange your lifestyle in a way that suits him the most. Whenever he calls you, he expects you to drop all your work and report for the duty right away, no matter how genuinely busy you are. He expects your life to revolve around him but will never reciprocate.

2. HE TRIVALISES YOUR DREAMS

Belittling your goals and aspirations and feeling superior has become a norm for him. He will make you feel that your dreams are not worthy or you don’t have the right attitude or skills to achieve them.

3. HE NEVER SPLIT THE EXPENSES

Another important factor of this kind of relationship is that your partner always happens to have some excuse to avoid splitting the bill. You may not find it an alarming reason but believe me; this guy lacks responsibility. It always ends up babysitting him and paying his all expenses.

4. HE MOCKS YOU AND PUT YOU DOWN

Teasing one another is a sign of a healthy relationship. However, having respect for your partner is the essential element of the same relationship. For this guy, using you as a subject for his stupid jokes in front of others is very normal. He is always trying to bully you and doesn’t miss a chance to put you down. He really can’t differentiate between joking and abusing.

5. SEX IS ‘THE’ PRIORITY

Physical intimacy is undoubtedly an essential aspect of any relationship. But with this guy, all he wants to do is – jump into the bed, couch and what not. The physical attachment from his side is always way higher than the emotional one. It seems like he can’t sit and have a normal conversation without being super-hyper for physical intimacy. Every passing day makes you think that with him, love is fake, and lust is real.

6. HE DOESN’T TRUST YOU

For any relationship to work, it is essential to give each other breathing space and pestering habits like interfering can cause a lot of problems. This guy won’t trust you and will show a lot of unhealthy habits like checking your phone or over-hearing your conversations. He loves to browse through your gallery, your texts and even calls logs to keep an eye on you. Not only this, but you will find him standoffish in front of your male friends too.

7. HE MAKES YOU LOOK LIKE THE BAD GUY

No matter what happens, there is only one bad guy in every situation. And that’s you! It doesn’t matter how much you had to suffer during a particular phase; this guy is a manipulator and knows how to make himself look like the victim in every situation. Whenever you try to put your point, he will end the conversation saying that either you are being selfish or just overreacting.

8. HE TRIES TO CONTROL YOUR LIFE

From friends to clothes, from food to movies; it seems like you need to seek his validation for everything. He loves to assert his control over you and expects you to inform him in advance before taking even the smallest of decisions.

Everyone wants to feel loved in their relationship. However, don’t let that love blindside you and don’t allow your partner to exploit you. Wake yourself up and set yourself free.